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Sep. 20th, 2006 | 09:39 pm
mood: calmcalm
music: silence
posted by: cantbe_trusted in tmserenity

The ship was quiet. A lot had happened in such a short time. Serenity knew this, and she kept flying, but even the ship couldn't hide her pain at Mal being hurt. Mal was her man, for lack of a better term. He found her when nobody else wanted her. He loved her. He kept her up in the sky, kept her flying. And for him, and this crew she had grown to love, she wanted to fly. Today, though, she didn't feel like flying at all. She certainly wasn't talking to Wash.

Which, in reality, was pissing Wash off. He knew what was going on, but he hated it. No matter what he did, which buttons he pressed or how he held the steering column, Serenity was flying hard, even for him. The ship bucked and throttled as he took off into, finally breaking atmo with some ease, but not before making the whole ship shudder. Setting a course for Sihnon, he sat there a few minutes, gently rubbing her console. He knew. Not many would understand a ship trying to talk to her pilot, captain, or engineer, but Wash could. He was one of the few.

Rising from his pilot's chair, he came down to the galley, wanting to check on Saffron. Seeing her so docile had been odd, for lack of a better word. Simon had administered the antidote on Saffron first, making sure there was no reaction before applying it to Mal. After some discussion, Zoe finally decided, and everyone agreed, that the best course of action was to lock up Saffron, like they locked up River after the incident at the Maidenhead. Who knew what it would do to her or who she would be when it took affect. Coming down to the galley, he peeked in on her. If she was awake, she was faking it really well. She looked passed out to him.

"Who are you," Wash murmured. "Why did you take them, then try to help? It doesn't make any sense? Why... why do you think you have to be so bad to get by?" Wash shook his head, not understanding. He made himself some tea, then decided to go check on Zoe. With Serenity on autopilot, they would be fine till they got close to Sihnon, then the proximity alert would go off.

Once he was gone, Saffron's eyes snapped wide open. "It's who I am," she murmured. Looking down at the cuffs, already she was trying to figure a way out of them.

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Comments {91}

drsimontam

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from: drsimontam
date: Sep. 21st, 2006 02:35 am (UTC)
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Simon shook as he left Mal's side. There were complications. He'd been forced to put him into an induced coma while Serenity was in space.

He couldn't stop working though... or he'd have a break down.

So he went to check on Saffron.

"I can't believe Zoe hasn't spaced you yet," he said as he knelt to check her bonds, then her vitals.

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from: cantbe_trusted
date: Sep. 21st, 2006 02:46 am (UTC)
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"Only thing I can think of is the wave," Saffron murmured. "Mal said he was going to wave Zoe... Must have."

She looked up at him, a helpless look in her eyes. She was trying to look helpless, though she didn't know if she was pulling it off. She could see by the look in his eyes that he wasn't one to mess with. He was closed off, hard to read, like Mal, but she didn't see the Simon everyone else saw when they looked at him. No stuttering or blushing. His gaze was so intense it made her shiver.

"I... I tried to help him. I... we talked. He... I..." She sighed. "I'm sorry."

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drsimontam

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from: drsimontam
date: Sep. 21st, 2006 03:04 pm (UTC)
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“Yes,” Simon snapped. “That’s one thing we agree on: what a sorry sack of go se you are.”

He palpated her wrists and peered into her eyes. “How are you feeling? Is the dizziness gone? Do your mental functions feel normal?”

He was coldly… clinically… furious with this bitch who’d done this to Malcom… to all of them… again.

“Where do you want us to drop you off?”

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from: cantbe_trusted
date: Sep. 21st, 2006 06:56 pm (UTC)
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Maybe she deserved his words. Maybe she deserved everything that he was giving to her. However, Saffron wasn't the type to take things lying down. She wasn't a pushover type of girl, never had been.

"I'm fine. Don't know about normal, though. Define normal?" She looked up at him, pulling her wrists away from him. Her eyes were fine, not dialated, and her pulse was back to normal. "Still a little dizzy, but that's probably just an after affect of what they did to me." She glared up at him.

"Mal said I could stay. If I helped him off. He was willing to give me another chance."

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drsimontam

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from: drsimontam
date: Sep. 21st, 2006 09:27 pm (UTC)
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"Yes," Simon said with a feigned distracted air. "That's why you are still alive... because Mal said so. YOu sure did help him. But because you can't be trusted, we'll just keep you locked up here."

His anger was about to turn to depression.

"Are you hungry?"

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from: cantbe_trusted
date: Sep. 21st, 2006 10:50 pm (UTC)
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Saffron blinked. It was the first time that she didn't seem so sure about herself in her eyes. She looked up at Simon, her jaw dropping open a little.

"What do you mean, I helped him," she asked. "He... he's gonna be alright, ain't he?" She sighed, feeling her heart leap up into her throat. He probably wasn't gonna be alright. And really, if it wasn't for her, they wouldn't be in this position, would they. She thought working with Atherton had been a good idea. But Niska, even Mal putting her in prison wasn't that horrific.

"Food... I should eat. I... I'm not hungry."

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drsimontam

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from: drsimontam
date: Sep. 21st, 2006 11:18 pm (UTC)
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"You're the one who got him snatched! That Wing tried to kill him! With a sword! If that's what you think of as help I'll thank you to help him no more!"

Simon scrubbed his hand through his hair. "I don't know. The antidote worked on you... and I thought it worked on him. But... there's something going on with his brain, his balance. At least we're headed to Sihnon where I can get him seen in a decent clinic...."

Simon trailed off, wondering if he was supposed to let Saffron know that sort of thing.

He heaved a sigh. "I'll get you a bowl of ... whatever I find in the kitchen." He moved toward the door, then glanced back at her.

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from: cantbe_trusted
date: Sep. 22nd, 2006 02:10 am (UTC)
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Saffron nodded her head. Her shoulders were slumped and she wouldn't look at him. Her hands were clenched together, so tight that her knuckles were starting to turn white. A few strands of her red hair fell down, into her eyes, partially hiding them from view. Either way, she wasn't looking up at him anyway. The lids were barely narrow slits.

"Won't help anymore. Don't know how," she whispered.

"Bowl... thanks."

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drsimontam

(no subject)

from: drsimontam
date: Sep. 22nd, 2006 09:45 pm (UTC)
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Simon returned to Saffron's cell bearing two bowls. He handed her one. It was an old trick he played on himself. He'd eat withthe patient to get them to eat... in order to get himself to eat.

"What ever happened to you ... on Bellaraphon?" Simon asked after his first bite. "Inara left you in a trash bin, wasn't it?"

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from: cantbe_trusted
date: Sep. 22nd, 2006 09:53 pm (UTC)
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Saffron took the bowl and the utensil, looking down at it. She was staring so intently, one might think the food would stare back or something. She didn't say anything, just sat, staring. So, he wanted to know what happened. Sure, she'll tell him what happened. Slowly, her eyes looked up into his.

"The Alliance took me. With a fingerprint and retinal scan, they saw... Durram Haymer was my first husband. Not the only one, obviously." She sighed. "So they returned me back to him. Durram believed that I needed help."

She might as well tell him. If Mal woke up, he'd never keep it secret anyway. Not from his crew she almost spat out.

"Durram had me sent away, to a rehabilitation prison. Not only was I in a prison, but they believed that how dare I take advantage of the Durram Haymer." Her voice grew a little colder, her eyes narrowing. Still, she didn't eat.

"They made sure I understood the consequences of trying to hurt someone so high up in the Alliance food chain."

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drsimontam

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from: drsimontam
date: Sep. 22nd, 2006 10:18 pm (UTC)
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"It's good... Kaylee made it," Simon gestured with a spoonful of food. It was good. He ate more.

Simon firmly agreed with Haymer that the woman needed psyche rehab. Such a waste of such shrewd intelligence... and physical assets. Life was a game to her... and she seemed to think that winning was only possible if everyone around her was losing.

"But Malcom's not Alliance... so hurting him didn't count."

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from: cantbe_trusted
date: Sep. 22nd, 2006 10:35 pm (UTC)
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"Didn't count? Didn't count?!" Saffron's voice got louder and she put down her food, not caring if she ever ate again.

"Mal was the reason! He turned me over to the Alliance when I was in that trash bin. He oculd have done something, anything to take revenge, but no, he turned me over to them! It was his fault. Him!"

She shook her head, staring hard at him. Didn't he understand?

"The Alliance are the lowest. No matter how I hate Mal, I never would have turned him over to them. They're not like us!" She shook her head and looked back down at her hands.

"You wouldn't understand."

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drsimontam

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from: drsimontam
date: Sep. 22nd, 2006 10:58 pm (UTC)
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Simon chuckled drily at her tantrum.

"No... I won't ever understand how it's ok to turn us over to junkmen to kill us... double cross us over a worthless antique laser... and ambush us so that a trumped up little oligarch can scar his face. No, ... Yolanda... I will never understand you." His tone dripped with scorn.

And yet, he felt like a bully, taking it out on someone who was chained up... Not at all the satisfaction he'd expected from seeing her get her comeuppance.

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from: cantbe_trusted
date: Sep. 22nd, 2006 11:11 pm (UTC)
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"My name isn't Yolanda." She shook her head and stared up at him. reaching up to push the strands of hair out of her eyes. The handcuffs clinked and dug a little into her wrists, chafing her.

""I..." She sighed. He was right. Everything he said was something she did. She didn't regret it either, but she did feel bad that Mal was hurt. She understood him when he was talking about Niska. She never meant for him to be hurt like this. She didn't think. Especially when he was willing to help her, even after evertyhing. He wanted to give her a chance.

And the worst part is she didn't know what to say. She really had nothing. "Can't say sorry anymore. You won't believe it anyway."

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drsimontam

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from: drsimontam
date: Sep. 22nd, 2006 11:36 pm (UTC)
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"Oh, I believe it," Simon said, looking at her intently. "But it's meaningless... 'sorry' doesn't change anything... You need to learn to do as you're told... That's the only way you can make it up to Mal... if you really want to..."

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from: cantbe_trusted
date: Sep. 22nd, 2006 11:40 pm (UTC)
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She balked at him, kicking the bowl of food toward him. Some of it flew out and hit her right in the face, which she probably deserved.

"Do as I'm told," she exclaimed. "You my next husband now? Gonna scold me and tell me what to do?" She lowered her voice, staring hard at him.

"Gonna hurt me like they did in prison? Oh they loved me there. Raped. Beaten. There's nothing that you can do to me that they didn't. I got to be the regular little doorknob, everyone took a turn." She swallowed, taking a deep breath. She would not cry in front of this man.

"What do you mean, do as you're told?"

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drsimontam

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from: drsimontam
date: Sep. 23rd, 2006 12:22 am (UTC)
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That outburst was unexpected. Simon felt suddenly, strongly, that this was a very young child... wrongly... forced to do as she was told...

And she'd never gotten beyond that.

He spoke softly. "Mal would have amade you crew... it's his ship... we all do as we're told... and that's why we're still flying. If we just follow Mal's lead... we'll be okay. Do you want to be crew?"

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from: cantbe_trusted
date: Sep. 23rd, 2006 12:26 am (UTC)
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Saffron's voice was almost a whisper, barely audible.

"Mal... he told me, if I helped him escape, I could. He... He wanted to give me another chance. It didn't matter what I did, he wanted to help me. He was willin' and carin' about me." She sighed.

"Most men, they try to take advantage of me from day one. Mal... He was the only man not to do that. Talkin' about droppin' me off and helpin' me to start new. How I shouldn't be beholdin' to him or nobody else, my own person."

She looked away from Simon, she couldn't look at him. "He seemed to care."

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drsimontam

(no subject)

from: drsimontam
date: Sep. 23rd, 2006 12:41 am (UTC)
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"He cares incredibly..." Simon said softly. "He's not like anyone else you've ever met... He does what's right... not always what's good... He's lost too much for that... but he does what's right."

"And if you follow him, do what he says, trust him... you'll find yourself doing what's right... It took me a year... " Simon sniggered. "It took the death of a planet for me to understand how truly great he is. Like everyone else, I took him at face value... a low class and not particulalry successful smuggler."

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from: cantbe_trusted
date: Sep. 23rd, 2006 12:45 am (UTC)
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Saffron couldn't believe it. This man, this person she didn't even know, was just like Mal. He was kind, caring, and trying to convince her to become a part of crew. Oh, granted, he probably didn't want her there anymore than the rest of them did. And yes, she remembered he had been with Mal, the look in Mal's eye. This was the one that Mal wanted, probably loved. She'd seen how he'd become protective and begging Simon didn't get taken. She remembered. And still, he was telling about loving Mal, she could hear it in his words. Trusting Mal, being a part of this crew.

"Crew don't want me here. The big guy would try to shoot me or use me. The girls don't want me here." She looked up at him. "Zoe would probably punch me in the face again and then kick me through the air lock while her husband watches."

She inched closer to Simon, looking down, at how close they had become since he kneeled down to her. "Not sure I know what's right anymore. You... You won't want me here."

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drsimontam

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from: drsimontam
date: Sep. 23rd, 2006 12:58 am (UTC)
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Simon sighed.

"I won't argue those truths... You have to prove yourself... We all have... I think Malcom punched me three times the first day we met and I came aboard." He smiled in memory.

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from: cantbe_trusted
date: Sep. 23rd, 2006 01:00 am (UTC)
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"What if I wanted to?"

She looked up at him, all puppydog eyes and pouty lips. In this respect, this was a hindrance for her, not a helper. Simon, Zoe, probably anyone, even Mal, would look at her and think she was trying to play him. And maybe she was, but maybe she was also lost, confused, and didn't know what to do. The only way they would know for sure is if they trusted her.

Seeme a lot needed to be based on trust.

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drsimontam

(no subject)

from: drsimontam
date: Sep. 23rd, 2006 01:07 am (UTC)
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"You have to shift your... interest from self to ship. Everything we do keeps Serenity flying... That's what brings us together. If we all focus on that... then... it goes well.

He sighed and finished his bowl. "When people shift from that... is when we have trouble." Like when Jayne wanted money to retire on... or Inara wanted to play games with Malcom's head... of Kaylee wanted to start a family...

"We just have to keep Serenity in the sky."

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from: cantbe_trusted
date: Sep. 23rd, 2006 01:10 am (UTC)
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Saffron nodded her head, listening to Simon. She honestly wasn't sure if she could do what he was telling her. She knew she wanted to. Badly. She wanted to fit in somewhere, to belong. And still, there was a part of her that wanted to play them. She heard somewhere that you had to hit your lowest point before you would begin to climb.

"C... can you help me?"

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from: cantbe_trusted
date: Oct. 22nd, 2006 03:45 pm (UTC)
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poke poke did you still want to play?

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